how to keep a well-intentioned simplification simple??

last winter kicked our butts...the recession took it's toll on our family business, but with luck, the tightening of our belts and endurance we did make it through and now the business appears to be stronger and healthier than ever...like after a good fast, the body is able to do more and be healthier. it burns away anything that was holding it back.

we have someone new in the office...it is actually a relief to me. i did like helping my husband, j...but i did not love that work and the ever present need to get to the office everyday made each day soooo stressful on top of all the other things i have to do...raising three children with a husband who is married also to his business is no piece of cake. something had to give... i realized this one day when all of the kids were in the office with me and j came in and said..."we need a babysitter!" and i replied, "no honey, we need a bookkeeper." it's that simple. i want to raise my own kids.

back to the business end...it's not quite august yet, but the winter approaching is a bit daunting already. i cannot imagine having to endure another like last year...and i guess what i am trying to find a way to do here, is still have the grace-filled family oriented life i so desire, with art, homeschooling and time to cook every single day, but also have the opportunity and ability and time to earn money of my own to ease the fears in my mind...

basically, home schooling our two older sons is something i cannot bare to give up on. also, my art work...this is something i can't physically stop doing. i have been known to sneak it into my days...i am afraid to even write this, but it actually appears to be taking off. i have numerous sales on my little etsy sites every week...and i have two craft fairs that i am planning on doing this year, one in september and one in march, so i do need to keep producing. and now that the bookkeeping is out of the way, i should have plenty of time to do these things, art and homeschooling and taking care of my family and cooking yummy food and all of those other domestic things i do...BUT...

i have a job prospect.

one that is almost too good to pass up.

i mention it in my last blog entry...a book, putting material together and doing the design and layout work for a fellow, well known artist whom i totally admire. actually i love her work, both her artwork and life work. Kate. it would be a great contact, a great opportunity and on top of that i can work from home...and this could be the insurance we need that we won't become one of the people to go under in these awful economic times if something (or nothing as the case may be) were to happen again with our construction biz...

i have a meeting scheduled to discuss the book with her in september, right after the first craft fair...

i suppose with that fair out of the way, i will be able to breathe for a little while on the art front and work on kate's project...with the boys' schooling taking up three to three to half hours in the morning, plus extra-curricular stuff and field excursions...i could always reserve three hours from 8:30 to 11:30 in the evenings daily to work on the book and squeeze in more if need be. i'm a night owl anyway and do my best work in the dark hours...sigh.

i just wouldn't want the new project to consume all that i love and undermine what i am trying to accomplish through simplifying...we already have one parent in this household consumed by work and business...we don't need another. i keep asking myself...is there a way to balance all of this???? can i give my children the education they deserve, take care of my family, create art, and have a job where someone is depending on me from the outside????

and scribbling hours and schedules down on paper is not the answer...i think perhaps diving in may be.

o, thoughts to ponder.