karate...and fighting.

i feel like i am really making myself vulnerable by writing about this subject...and yet i am continuing to write about it. it may help someone else deal a problem in the future...so i must divulge...

a few years ago my family was part of a parent-run holistic school in our area. to sum it up briefly and unemotionally, the school was a haven for kids with some serious disabilites...some of those disabilities being that they were abused and thus abusive...and there was little supervision at the school and much protection from the governing body of such harmful kids...basically after a short while we realized the school posed a greater risk than it was worht and we left...the first of over a half dozen parent to abandon the idyllic vision the school tried to bring from the 60's.

there was one child in particular that in my opinion posed the biggest threat. he was 9/10 at the time and only liked to play with the 4 and 5 year olds. he was violent in his play and speach and actions...and he lied, stole and had accidents (still pooped inhis pants at school) he taught the 4, 5 and 6 year olds a game where you can kill the bad guys by sucking their...well...you can imagine. no one actually had physical abuse come to them...although the ideas placed before them could have been argued as abuse.

my son was the first to divulge the weirdness going on. we left the school immediately upon knowing that this was going on...only to have the mother of the said child remove the child from school...and to my knowledge he has never returned. i have not kept up on the family's gossip. nor have i listened to the hate talk they have tried to spread about my family in their circle of crazies.

seriously...i can't express to you the kind of mom the mom was adequately. she talked about fairies, and wondered why on earth didn't i smoke or do drugs after i refused her offer of a cigarette or a joint for the 50th time.

she was in outer space, exposing her kid to who knows what...and i don't dare lay blame on who was abusing the boy, but i do sincerely feel he was being abused. his behavior was learned. it was all about control. it was more than not okay. and a year before we had come to this school he had forced two kids several years younger than himself to do "things" to each other...no one told us until after we had come forward about our pkans to leave...although long after we voiced our suspicions... no one ever pressed charges. no one ever filed a report to save their own kids' butts from a "record"...

anyway. my kids started in a karate class tonight. said abusive kid is in this class. he is 4 or 5 years older than my oldest...and i worry. we have as much right to take the class as he does...not that we are trying to impose, but it is the best, closest, most affordable class and my kids have the right to take it.

seeing him. his crazy mother. made me remember the insanity of that school. of the people trying to protect this child. trying to sacrifice my child for his good. i felt defensive. offensive even. i don't know if i can handle having to sit in the same room as her once a week when really i want to wrestle her and make her see her lifestyle is really abusive to her kid...

sigh.